So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
