Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
