I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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