I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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