I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
