Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Randomize
