white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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