I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
How external is "for external use only"?
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
