Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
