I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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