omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
