I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
