when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
