I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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