It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
