well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Randomize
