Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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