I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
