God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
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