we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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