Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Randomize
