I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I didn't shave. On purpose
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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