absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
