I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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