I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
