Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
