well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
