Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Randomize
