Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
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