He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Randomize
