ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Houston, we have a blender
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize