this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
