he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
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