are you so shy because you have an std?
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
i would one night stand the shit outta him
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
