I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize