Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
