The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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