if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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