I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
