then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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