i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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