i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Randomize
