So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Randomize
