So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
3pm strippers are depressing
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
