the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
