four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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