Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize