We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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