I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize
