Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
