You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
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